Category Archives: not-to-do list

The Organized Woman

30 Friday Mar 2012

Posted by in Cleaning, Decluttering, Goal Setting, goals, Home Education, Homemaking, not-to-do list, Practical Help, Recipes

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It looks good, doesn’t it, that title up there for all the world to see; The Organized Woman?

One of the questions I am asked by women who have less children than I do and are feeling overwhelmed is, “How do you do it all?” The answer, of course, is that I don’t do it “all” (see my Not-To-Do List).

We all have different families, schedules, health challenges, energy levels, income and living spaces. Who am I to tell you how to organize your life? I can, however, share with you some things that have worked for me.

Access to a Full Year of Lists to Help Put Your World in Order


I’ve tried different planners and home schooling binders. I usually buy one in the heat of summer just because it motivates me as I begin another year of homeschooling…I flip through the pages and feel important and official and special ;-) (I’ve been homeschooling for 22 years-I need all the motivation I can get!).

I’ve finally realized that planners and binders are too bulky for me to carry around which is why they eventually end up all by their lonely selves on a shelf. So how do I remember what I am supposed to be doing with myself?

I like those small pocket-sized calenders that I can keep in my purse where I am less likely to loose them and I like lists! They are the personal secretary I wish I had to remind myself of the details of life.

Access to a Full Year of Lists to Help Put Your World in Order

When I go out the door to speak at an event I usually leave in the wee hours of the morning. I need a list! One for what I need to do for the family who is remaining at home and one that tells me what I need to take with me (I give away books, I display resource materials, I hand out business cards, I show off a picture of my beautiful family.I have so much fun!).

“ListPlanIt” is a mom owned business that has grown from 200 lists and planning pages when it first launched in May 2007 to more than 500. Its membership is more than 3,000 listmakers strong. It is a place where those who simply love lists and those in need of a little assistance in mental organization can both find what they need”.

Jennifer Tankersley of ListPlanIt has put together so many different lists for you and I so that we don’t have to. I think of ListPlanIt as my own personal assistant. My brain doesn’t work in a methodical careful way but, apparently Jennifer’s does because, wow, she has compiled some wonderful resources for the busy woman.

I like the fact that I can print what I need when I need it. I like the fact that ListPlanIt is open to new ideas for more lists and at 20.00 a year (!!)for the downloadable option…it is a bargain for anyone who wants to be more organized.

*I am an affiliate with ListPlanIt so I do get a small percentage of each sale that is generated through this blog. All proceeds generated through this blog help me continue to encourage and teach those who hold the next generation on their laps.

Check out ListPlanIt! Hundreds of Lists to Put Your World in Order

Access to a Full Year of Lists to Help Put Your World in Order

Are You Real? Keeping Your Integrity in a Cyber World

23 Monday Jan 2012

Posted by in Inspirational Mama, not-to-do list, Practical Help, Sticking through tough times, Strong families, Thoughts and Prayers

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It was many years ago and we were poor. I was pregnant, tired and struggling with depression. My computer literacy was even less than it is now but I did know how to click the little “solitaire” icon and play the card game, and I did, over and over and over again.

Our son Kealen (age fifteen, then two) toddled his little diaper-clad self into the office one day and asked me about the “puter”. His exact words were….”Momy play’puter’?” My heart did a “pang” when I heard his innocent voice asking me about the “puter” and I realized that I was neglecting my precious little fifth born boy for a machine.

Computers are miraculous inventions. With the touch of a button we can share information, contact like- minded people and learn just about anything.

We can also create a cyber-reality and give the impression that we are almost perfect Titus 2 women who run organized homes, raise godly children and bless our husbands all while we blog, facebook and twitter about it!

Our readers don’t see us when we impatiently yell up the stairs for our teens to come finish the dishes or watch us groggily slam the coffee pot on the counter in frustration because we are out of beans and it is 6 am. in the rainy Pacific Northwest.

In other words, it’s easy to fake it on the computer screen.

But God (in His goodness) gave us children. Children who know what “real” is even when we are fooling ourselves. Children who see the hypocrisy when we hide it from our husbands. Children whose hearts are created for real.

Maybe your nemesis isn’t the amount of time you spend on the computer but the time you spend on your hand-held thingy, texting or talking.

You know, when you’re at the playground and your preschooler is calling out, “Mommy, mommy, mommy WATCH ME!”? (and sometimes you feel like you are going to go berserk if she calls your name one more time?)…did you know that she truly, really needs you just to watch her? You validate her! She doesn’t want some other mommy watching her she wants you! When you look at her…really look at her…something wonderful happens inside of her.

Make no mistake about it, this parenting thing takes a lifetime and it is made up of all those seemingly insignificant moments of watching and clapping and listening and remembering.

The same goes for marriage. Don’t postpone spending time with your husband until after everything else is done. You’ll find yourself no longer married to a man who bitterly thinks you never cared. Don’t buy the lie the feminists keep rehashing that anyone can build a glorious, happy marriage with one hand tied behind their back. That is foolishness.

We all have only twenty-four hours in a day and, I don’t know about you, but an inordinate amount of my day is spent on waking people up and putting them to bed, finding lost things and replacing broken things. If we throw in a clogged toilet and an argument that needs to be solved there just isn’t a whole lot of time left over for being constantly distracted by our cool devices.

So, if you have to turn off your computer forever…do it! Be real.

If you have to leave your phone behind for part of the day…do it! Be real.

Make sure you really see your child because, it’s true what they say, children grow up too fast.

Don’t miss out on hearing the amazing things your children say. Don’t miss out on catching them doing something right. Don’t miss out on looking them in the eyes and telling them, “I am so glad you were born.”

This post is dedicated to my friend Connie who is going through Facebook withdrawals after realizing that it had become a stumbling block to her in different areas. Fight the good fight, my friend!

Slaying Dragons; What Christian Women Can Learn From the Business World

15 Sunday Jan 2012

Posted by in becoming a stay at home mom, Goal Setting, goals, Homemaking, Inspirational Mama, Marraige, not-to-do list, Practical Help, Rest and Refreshment

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I am a Christian mom and I read leadership blogs, not because I am hankering to trade my home for a conference room but because much of what they say applies to me.

After all, I am the manager of my home; I oversee the functioning of a busy household and I teach and train the future generation. I find that much of what business leaders say is motivational as well as applicable to me; mom of many-wife of one-follower of Jesus.

I keep quoting Michael Hyatt on my blog because he writes wisdom. Consider this; How Differences With Your Spouse Can Make Your Marriage Stronger. Michael may have been CEO of Thomas Nelson Publishers but he has, apparently, been thinking about the whole marriage thing for a long time. I can learn from him.

Another post by Mr. Hyatt addresses the battle that some of us face every morning as we get out of bed. Read this creative look at starting our day Slay Your Dragons before Breakfast.

Really, that’s why I read these kind of posts. I have lots of dragons to slay. Some days I feel like I am in a jousting match against the world and my mind and emotions can take a downward spiral unless I read good, solid, practical advice on how to focus my mind so I can do what is right even in the confines of my home where no one will fire me:-).

I have met many women who tell me that “someday” they plan to read more…when they have the time. Actually, they have the time now but they are choosing to use it for other things. I know that some of us are “Marys” (ie. contemplative) and others are “Marthas” (ie, “do-ers”) but all of us have thoughts we are continually thinking throughout the day. And those thoughts influence our actions. Why not renew your mind, first with God’s word and then with the wisdom of fellow Christians who have proven themselves to be people who get things done? Why not read?

The Not-To-Do List for Moms

02 Monday Jan 2012

Posted by in Goal Setting, Homemaking, Inspirational Mama, not-to-do list, Practical Help, Rest and Refreshment

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I shamelessly stole this idea from leaders in the business world (visit Michael Hyatt for more great inspiration) because it is an idea that will change your life.
Here it is…are you ready? Write (and execute) a “not-to do” list! There you go…isn’t that profound?

Here’s the thinking; people who get a lot done are people who know what they do best. That’s the big secret to their lives. They don’t just write “to do” lists but they have their own “not-to-do” lists. They truly don’t do it all.

We women can apply this wise principle to our lives. We can focus on those areas we excel at and we can carefully choose not to do many things that waste our time. Of course there are many things that we may not be very good at but still need to do anyway (for example, cooking; children need to be fed on a regular basis so, although cooking may not be my passion, I do it anyway…all the time!).

So, in the spirit of transparency and self-revelation I am bravely sharing with you some of the many items on my “not to do list”. Keep in mind that you and I are very different and what I consider to be a time waster may be something you are invigorated and inspired by.I am sharing my list with you just to get you thinking about creating your own “not to do” list.

1)I do not talk on the phone regularly or for a long time. I don’t multi-task on the phone well and I get stressed when I can’t focus exclusively on my phone call. I am old enough that I miss the old phones with the cords connected to the wall where I had to sit down by the phone while I was talking! I return most phone messages via email.

2)I rarely shop “for fun”. Shopping takes a lot of time and I don’t enjoy it. Enough said!

3)I don’t spend a lot of time decorating or thinking about it. My “style” is clean, bright and homey. A quote by Peter Marshall is my inspiration:

“There is beauty in homely things that many people have never seen:
sunlight through a jar of beach plum jelly;
a rainbow in soapsuds in dishwater;
an egg yolk in a blue bowl;
white ruffled curtains sifting moonlight;
the color of cranberry glass;
a little cottage with blue shutters;
crimson roses in an old stone crock;
the smell of newly baked bread;
candlelight on old brass;
the soft brown of a cocker’s eyes.”

4)I don’t attend a lot of baby showers and girl-type events. I get impatient with chit-chat and prefer to sit in the corner and talk with one person. This “not-to-do” will change when I get to go to my grandbaby’s showers!

5)I don’t spend a lot of time putting my younger kids to bed. We read aloud, I kiss them goodnight,pray over them and off they go!

6)I rarely cook breakfast or anything that takes a lot of clean-up in the morning. I may, occasionally, make muffins ahead of time but I keep breakfast short and simple so we can get on with our day.

7)I choose not to participate in a lot of playgroups or homeschooling co-op activities. Driving children to those things takes time(and then I spend too much money on things like coffee while I am waiting for them).

8)I don’t spend a lot of time with girlfriends, probably because by the time I get finished listening to (and talking with) my eight children and my husband I am out of words(and time!).

9)I don’t leave the house day after day. As boring as it sounds, I get way more done if I stay home.
(I am not a total recluse, I do practice hospitality and invite people in ;-) ).

10)I don’t spend a lot of time (or money)on beauty services. I don’t like strangers touching me so a massage doesn’t relax me (and I’ve never had a professional manicure)and, because I have a sensitive scalp and a lot of hair, getting my hair done is like paying for personal torture :-) . I tell my husband that he is a fortunate man.

There you have it…more than you ever wanted to know, I am sure!

Knowing what you are willing to say “no” to is just as important as remembering all that you need to “do” each day.Why not sit down and make your “not-to-do” list for the New Year?

A Letter to the Christian Hipsters

16 Wednesday Mar 2011

Posted by in Changing the next generation, not-to-do list, Sharing Jesus, Thoughts and Prayers

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This may seem like a strange post to add to my blog aimed at conservative Christian woman but I thought it might help someone who is observing and wondering about certain “developments” within Christendom.

An article called Hipster Faith by Brett McCracken caught my eye and as I read it I was slam-dunked by a host of memories. You can read the article here.

The article describes Christian hipsters who say they reject the traditional fuddy duddy evangelicalism that they grew up with and are, instead, embracing a lifestyle and church community that is more like the way secular hipsters live. You have to read the article to get the full focus and feel of what is happening among these young people.

When I say I was slam-dunked by a host of memories, I was taken back to my childhood among the hippies in New Mexico and the kind of anger that generation had toward anyone who had lived before them. They threw out anything that was from the “establishment” and embraced everything “new”…only sin isn’t new and never has been.

It was this experience that first caused me to begin thinking about living generationally because, as the little sister of hippies, I was profoundly and deeply influenced and affected by what I witnessed in the generation just ahead of me (and not in a good way).

Here is the letter I would have written to the editor if I had read the article in a timely manner (and not months after it came out).

As an “older” Christian I read with interest the hard-hitting article in Christianity Today. I found it interesting and a bit humorous that Brett McCracken describes how Christian hipsters are quick to toss out traditional expressions of faith and relate more to secular hipsters than with those”traditional” evangelical fuddy-duddy folks.

I bit back a laugh as I read this because there really is nothing new under the sun (as it says in the book of Ecclesiastes). Do Christian hipsters really delude themselves into thinking that their faith is on the cutting edge in Christianity?

I grew up during the 1960′s and 1970′s in a hippie town in New Mexico as the little sister of a couple of hippies and I witnessed first-hand a generation who rebelled against what the previous generation had taught, believed or said. The results in my brothers and sister’s generation were very sad. Many of those beautiful teens did not make it to adulthood and those who did struggled with addictions, sexually transmitted diseases and depression for the rest of their lives.

Gee…I don’t know…maybe it’s just me but the Bible does seem to say a lot about becoming wise(the entire book of Proverbs, for example). Some questions for you, “Do you Christian hipsters really want to dump out the wisdom of those older evangelicals just because they don’t look and talk the way you think they should?” and “Have you considered that there are some really incredible older believers who could benefit from your youth and passion and pass on such creaky artifacts as knowledge,experience and (!!) passion for Jesus to you?”

Christians get themselves into deep water when they fail to remember that they are sinners with a propensity to ……uh…sin. Blurring the lines about what is sin and what is not does not take away the temptation to become mired in a lifestyle that reeks of…sin. Oh, and let’s not delude ourselves that Christians haven’t been involved in defending the poor and downtrodden since the dawn of the faith. Study history and get a clue.

There is much that needs to change in the Megachurch touchy-feely evangelicalism in the Western world today but Christian hipsters shouldn’t delude themselves that reactionary churches are the way to develop a solid faith which will help them persevere throughout a lifetime of living.

Christian hipsters is “What are you passing on to the next generation? Is it worthwhile. Will it last?” I hope so.

The Lord Jesus Christ who redeemed this sad, suicidal sinner in a college dormroom over 33 years ago is still working. Get busy worshipping and serving Him and don’t get sidetracked into being cutting edge cool(the hippies were way cooler man!).

Sincerely, Jill Farris